Donald Trump, in what seems like yet another blatant attempt to expose his supporters and the entire GOP as inbred, uneducated, troglodytes called Ted Cruz a “baby.” It gets even worse, as now Ted Cruz has abandoned all pretense of adulthood and joined Trump on the playground wholeheartedly calling Trump, in no uncertain terms “Fat Bastard” from the movie Austin Powers.
Donald Trump after calling Cruz the “biggest liar he has ever dealt with,” at a campaign rally in Sparks, Nevada said:
I’ve met much tougher people than Ted Cruz. He is like a baby compared to some of the people I have to deal with. He is like a little baby: soft, weak, little baby by comparison.
In an indefensibly childish, yet unfortunately epic, slam, Cruz responded by tweeting not only a video clip of Fat Bastard but also that he hoped the GOP’s Tangerine-colored canker sore would not eat him. Yes, really, here it is:
— Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) February 24, 2016
I really don’t want to praise the comparison, because this tweet, from a politician, seems almost like a cry for help. You know, like when we tell kids that if they are being bullied they need to find an adult they can trust to help them: except these two men are running for the “top adult” position in the United States.
Perhaps it is time for the GOP to hire a nanny, someone that can help defuse these situations before they escalate into an international “laughing stock” situation — as this has.
Trump, who seems to have rested his entire campaign on mockery, shock-jockery, and absurdity, went on to claim that the attacks he has leveled “exposing” liar-liar pants Cruz as a “nasty person,” he may just take Texas:
I’d like to really win in Texas. Wouldn’t that be great? I love Texas. I love Texas. And I think now that (Cruz) has exposed himself as a nasty person who lies a lot, I think he’s going to go way, way down in Texas. So I think we have a shot in Texas.
He also indicated that he will probably be attacking Marco Rubio next, saying:
Marco Rubio is a nice young man. He hasn’t hit me. No, no, no, he has not hit me. When he hits me, ugh, is he going to be hit. Actually, I can’t wait, I hope he does [get nasty] because it’s more fun.
The sad fact, these men are PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES. Can you imagine if even ONE time, President Barack Obama had leveled ONE attack of this low, grade-school, caliber against ANYONE? The Congress would have had him impeached, and the entire country would be looking at him sideways.
This is the level of the GOP. If you still are considering voting for EITHER of these men, please, write in Fat Bastard, or Mini-Me, or even Austin Powers… please. It is much safer for the rest of us, can you actually imagine Trump or Cruz with their finger on the “trigger?”
Featured image created by the Mad Asshatter