Top 7 Reasons Trump Spokeswoman Katrina Pierson Is The Sarah Palin Of 2016


Donald Trump may have actually found a spokesperson that is truly worthy of his epic level of asshattery when he picked Tea Party idiot Katrina Pierson as his voice to the world. Her resume is spotty at best, her past history shows a contempt for the law, she uses accessories like a prop-comic to garner meaningless attention to herself and she seems to be leveraging a political presence purely for personal gain.

If that isn’t a perfect Sarah Palin, I don’t know what is.

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The Tea Party kicked it up a notch with Pierson. She’s half black, among all her other “credentials”, so of course, that means the Tea Party is officially not racist now. However, when you look at her history through the lens of something other than a gun scope, the shine definitely comes off the apple.

Here are the top 7 reasons, so far, that Katrina Pierson is Sarah Palin 2.0

1: She hates our social safety net system, like every Tea Partier, but used it extensively in her lifetime to survive.

Pierson was born to a teen mom and raised “in the system” of social safety nets. You know, the same things she hates now that she is not reliant on them anymore. Pierson also had a child at a young age and relied on social assistance programs then as well. She has also collected unemployment benefits during her lifetime. These programs are good enough for her, just not good enough for anyone else.

2: She claims she voted for Barack Obama but became a Tea Partier when Obama refused to wear an American flag pin.

Like many people who used to call themselves Democrats so society wouldn’t hate them, Pierson turned Tea Party the moment she realized that she could be a selfish, greedy, overgrown child and the Tea Party would validate that behavior. Also, like all Republicans, she can’t admit to that fact – so she blamed turning Tea Party on the fact Obama didn’t wear a flag pin on some random day.

3: She was convinced to turn Republican because Sarah Palin because seemed “more normal“.

This one is pretty much self-explanatory. Every Republican that existed before 2008 hated Sarah Palin. Every knuckle-dragger that suddenly realized they were Republican when Sarah thawed out of the Alaskan tundra loves her. Enough said on that.

4: Pierson worked for the Tea Party Leadership Fund, which is basically a scam operation that grifts simpletons out of their money and spends it on lavish salaries for people within the organization.

Pierson was paid $30,000 to serve as the public face of member campaigns for 6 months, where her job was to have her name attached to the sender line of mass mailings that the group conducted.

5: She cut and run on Ted Cruz when she became enamored with Trump’s bigoted anti-immigrant policies.

Pierson had a run-in with trump in Myrtle Beach, and later in the same month at the Iowa Freedom Summit. She expressed her desire to join his campaign after he expressed his desire to shut our borders to Muslims. Translation: She knew he would be the most popular candidate so she sold out Cruz and joined Trump so she could get more air time.

6: She uses props to pander to crowds because if she has to talk too much she starts to sound insane.

Pierson wore a necklace made of bullets on live TV, during a resurgence in the debate over gun control legislation in America.

 

Katrina Pierson Bullet Necklace

Palin used a Big Gulp soda during the time when there was right-wing controversy over Michael Bloomberg proposing the idea of a ban on large sodas in New York City.

Sarah Palin

7: Pierson doesn’t even care about Politics. She has plans to use her new fame and money to launch her own clothing line.

Is there anything more quintessentially Palin, than being her own personal dog and pony show, in order to cultivate that tabloid fame into cheap short-term profit schemes?

So long Sarah. I wish I could say it’s been great to have you here, but I’d be lying.

Featured image via Youtube

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