Keith Richards Once Pulled A Knife To Keep Trump Away From A Rolling Stones Concert


With every passing day, we discover someone else who’s repulsed, mortified, sickened, and disgusted by Donald Trump. He is the most revolting man in the world and he doesn’t care; he will continue his pro-wrestling storyline since this is just one big game for him. There are many stories involving spats and falling outs with Trump, but all of them pale in comparison to an incident involving The Rolling Stones’ Keith Richards.

In 1989, the Rolling Stones’ original members ended their seven-year hiatus to take on a lucrative 115-show tour of Europe and North America. The American leg began in August in Philadelphia and ended in December in Atlantic City. This is where things really get interesting. The final show was to take place at Boardwalk Hall, which was allegedly sponsored by the adjacent Trump Plaza Hotel and Casino. Trump was actually somewhat reasonable and marginally decent in the 1980s, but yet the Stones still wanted nothing to with him. 

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On the night of the event, I get word that I have to come to the press room in the next building,” Michael Cohl, the tour’s promoter, told Pollstar last August. “I run to the press room in the next building and what do you think is happening? There’s Donald Trump giving a press conference, in our room!

According to Cohl, Trump proceeded to do what he does now when he doesn’t get his way.

They begged me to go up, Michael,” said Trump. “Stop it,” Cohl replied. “Don’t make a liar of yourself.

Apparently he has been making a liar f himself for 30 years. Under the impression that he squashed the problem, Cohl returned to the dressing room only to get word five minutes later that Trump, being the bombastic a-hole he is, had found his way back to the mic.

Donald,” Cohl pleaded. “I don’t know if I can control this. Stop it.

 This is when legendary bassist Keith Richards stepped in:

Keith pulls out his knife and slams it on the table and says, ‘What the hell do I have you for? Do I have to go over there and fire him myself? One of us is leaving the building – either him, or us.’

One of two things is going to happen,” Cohl told Trump. “You’re going to leave the building and, at 6:40, The Rolling Stones are going to speak on CBS News, or you’re not going to leave the building and I’m going to go on and do an interview to explain to the world why the pay-per-view was canceled.

Damn! I know he’s basically a corpse now, but perhaps Keith Richards should show up at a Trump rally and act as an enforcer. This is when a bad situation turned even worse.

After flat-out firing Donald Trump, Cohl soon noticed Trump’s “three shtarkers he’s with, in trench coats, two of them are putting on gloves and the other one is putting on brass knuckles.” Then, like a page out of the Outsiders, Cohl signaled his head of security. According to Cohl, they had “40 of the crew with tire irons and hockey sticks and screwdrivers.” Apparently this was enough to scare of Trump and his paid goons. 

And that was the night I fired Donald Trump,” Cohl concluded.

This is the same man who now seeks to have access to the nuclear launch codes. Allow that to marinate for a little bit.


Featured image via Flickr

michael hayne headshotedited111 Michael is a comedian/VO artist/Columnist extraordinaire. Follow him on TwitterFacebook,   and ImpressionsGuy.com

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