We’ve seen a lot of snake oil salesmen and grifters in this country. We have Pseudo-Christians and wild-eyed Evangelicals trying to insinuate themselves into our political process and pushing laws that are (poorly) informed by their religion. But most of them are pikers compared to the woman whom Donald Trump calls his “spiritual adviser.”
Paula White is the pastor at the New Destiny Christian Center in Apopka, Florida. Her doctrine strays a bit from the typical Evangelical fare, however. Prominent spokesmen for the Evangelicals call her a “heretic” and a “charlatan” and say that her brand of “faith” is not well-received by mainstream, traditional Christians.
And what a brand it is. This past Easter she told parishioners that she would give them a “resurrection seed” — rather like the Resurrection Stone from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows — for a donation of merely $1,144. Referring to scripture about the raising of Lazarus, she told them:
I don’t know what decision that caused death to come upon whatever the situation you’re facing, but I do know that God has sent me to you to bring resurrection life.
Why so specific? White says God told her that was what to ask for. Yes, that’s right. God not only speaks to Paula White, He has a sense of order, too. Because the dollar amount matches the chapter and verse White speaks of:
It’s not often I ask very specifically but God has instructed me and I want you to hear. This isn’t for everyone but this is for someone. When you sow that $1,144 based on John 11:44 I believe for resurrection life. You say, Paula, I just don’t have that, then sow $144. I don’t have that. Sow $44 but stand on John Chapter 11:44.
Nice. So Grandma will forego her medication to buy a bit of fakery from a woman who says that God talks to her. But hang on… just like Ronco and Ginsu, there’s more! If you buy a resurrection seed, you will also receive, at no extra charge, a prayer cloth. That’s right
marks folks, a gen-u-ine prayer cloth that brings “miracles, signs and wonders.” Your mileage may vary.
It’s bad enough that this woman is even operating and bilking people out of their hard-earned money. But she has the unmitigated gall to tell them that, if their resurrection seed didn’t work, it was their own fault. That this woman is one of those “prosperity gospel” grifters should be evident by now.
And guess who she claims to have “brought to Jesus?” None other than King Cheeto himself, Donald of Orange. And not only that, she is the one who put together Trump’s “evangelical advisory committee.” Not Ben Carson. Not Michele Bachmann. Paula White.
White is convinced that Trump is a true man of God. Because, hey, he shakes hands with the little people. He shook hands with a Latino groundskeeper and even thanked the man for his hard work. She saw it and heard it! What more proof do you need?
Oh, and she has been under investigation by the IRS and Congress and has been rumored to have had affairs. Well, that’s about par for the course. She and Trump can discuss their business problems and divorces over a martini at Mar-A-Lago. They have a lot in common.
This woman, who steals ideas from Harry Potter and is known as a heretic among the people she is supposed to bring to Trump, is advising The Donald on religion. Folks, you just can’t make this stuff up. But Paula White can and does. And rips off her flock in the process. If I believed in Hell, I would say that she deserves a window seat on the Inferno Express. Trump can have the aisle.
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