Whatever programmers set up the latest model of the K311Y4NN-3 (commonly known as Kellyanne Conway by those who are not aware that she was not born, but was constructed in a not-so-sophisticated robotics workshop) bot need to hop back in and do some spot rewiring, because what just happened on Fox News is f*cking nuts even for Trump’s favorite emotionless automaton.
Conway made an appearance on Sean Hannity’s show and, as is customary, made a complete fool out of herself and anyone who believes a single word that comes out of her lie-hole (to use the technical term for what would normally be called a “mouth”).
If you have been living under a rock, you may be unaware that Donald Trump Jr. proved once and for all that Eric is not the “stupid one” in the Trump family. Not only did he arrange a meeting with a Kremlin-connected lawyer who promised him damaging information about Hillary Clinton on behalf of the Russian government, but he actually tweeted emails that proved it. He even managed to implicate former Trump campaign manager Paul Manafort and Ivanka Trump’s husband Jared Kushner.
According to Conway, all of this does nothing to prove collusion with Russia — “yet.” She even brought along a couple pieces of paper to demonstrate why in perhaps the dumbest segment on any news (term used loosely, as it’s both Fox News and Hannity) show in recent history.
After Conway and Hannity were through spouting a number of lies about President Obama and Hillary Clinton and “collusion,” Conway whipped out two piece of paper. One read “Conclusion” and “Collusion” (the latter had a big red “X” through it). The other read “Illusion” and “Delusion.”
“What’s the conclusion? Collusion? No. We don’t have that yet,’” Conway said as her wiring apparently fried. “I see illusion and delusion. Just so we’re clear, everyone. Conclusion? Collusion, no. Illusion and delusion, yes.”
According to Conway, Trump Jr.’s treasonous actions don’t matter because he allegedly obtained “zero usable information” — you know, like if you whip out a gun to rob a bank and walk out without any money. Except this is treason, which is a much more serious crime.
“I just thought we’d have some fun with words like Sesame’s Grover,” Conway said, apparently unaware that the show on which the character appears is called “Sesame Street.”
Someone apparently never told Conway not to hold up white pieces of paper on TV, so the usual hilarity ensued:
— (@tibbspdx) July 13, 2017
— Persistent Woman (@PixMichelle) July 13, 2017
— D.Gill (@Dan_Gill22) July 13, 2017
Why is everyone in the White House so in to ‘Hangman’? pic.twitter.com/xGHrAt1MeD
— Matthew Keenan (@TheRealMKeenan) July 13, 2017
— Tony Posnanski (@tonyposnanski) July 13, 2017
— John Grady (@thejohngrady) July 13, 2017
— Burke (@SarcasticBurke) July 13, 2017
No one likes prop comedy, Kellyanne. No one.
Watch this monumental act of dumbf*ckery below:
This just happened on Hannity….. pic.twitter.com/nOYn7Th2aL
— Yashar Ali (@yashar) July 13, 2017
Featured image via screengrab