In news you’re always supposed to look for that “dog bites man” story. But this is America, Andrea Tantaros says we’re awesome, and AMURRICA, by Almighty Baby Jesus, can do better. Yes, it had to happen eventually here: Dog Shoots Man.
On December 18th, 2014, Wyoming man Richard L. Fipps was doing what all Wyoming men named Fipps do in December…riding around with a loaded rifle in the back of his truck. Actually, he wasn’t riding, so much as he was looking for snow chains to ride somewhere.
The chains were loaded into the back of the truck “with some other gear,” including the loaded rifle. Fipps was messing about in the bed when his dog, who I’m going to call, “Dick Cheney,” jumped up unbidden into the bed.
Moments later, Dick Cheney, according to Sheriff Steve Koziesk,
Either stepped on it or caused something to move, and set it off.
The shot hit Fipps in the left bicep, rendering the appendage useless, and leaving him effectively dis-armed. While facing a violent, felonious animal with a gun.
But the brave Wyoming man knew exactly what to do. He called 9-1-1, and requested emergency services. Thankfully, police arrive shortly thereafter. Because we all know that only a good guy with a gun can stop a bad dog with a gun.
A very, very BAD DOG!
Descriptions of the canine shooter, apart from his species, haven’t been released to the public as of now. But since Bill O’Reilly hasn’t yet gone on air to call Dick Cheney a “thug,” we can probably assume he’s white.