Peg Littleton is one of several very special elected Republicans. She is able to figure out the right way to do her job using nothing but her Bible. This is how she solved the “mystery” of fracking earthquakes, as you will read below.
Peg recently attended a corporate gathering where she was bragging up the benefits of fracking in Weld County, a haven for frackers, in Colorado. While there, she joined a few other Republican know-nothings to demonize the EPA and promise that if elected to the U.S. Senate, she would abolish the agency.
Peg didn’t want to let herself be outdone by her competitors. That was when she decided to go full-Jesus. Peg proudly declared that all scientific reports showing links between fracking and earthquakes were wrong, fraudulent, and part of the liberal agenda. The reason why is literally the best thing ever. She said it’s because only God can cause earthquakes.
You know when a Republican needs a reason why, or why not about anything, that it will always come back to “because, God.”
“There have been earthquakes long before we ever did fracking,” she said. “Let’s be honest. You know God is kind of in control of those. And not by us drilling down in the ground and doing the fracking.”
What can you really say to that? This is why Democrats can’t work with Republicans. You can’t work with someone who is too stupid to do their own job. It’s like having a monkey help with brain surgery.
Then it got even better…
Jon Keyser, a state legislator with his eye on moving to Washington D.C, took it up a notch. He literally declared that fracking was a miracle from God, and promised that he would “educate” people on its wondrous benefits.
“As a U.S. senator,” he said, “I will make sure I travel around the state and I will talk to people about the miracle that is a combination of horizontal drilling and hydraulic fracturing.”
Well then… So far we have one person who God told fracking wasn’t causing the earthquakes because he was, and we have another who knows the very fact fracking exists is because of a divine miracle. Are you voting blue this November? I sure am.
Featured image via Colorado Pols